The Civic Literacy Quiz

Hello everyone!

Take the Civic Literacy Quiz. Surely, you'll score better than the average US elected official at 44%. Sorry for calling you "Shirley." That joke works much better when spoken than written.

Anyway, I scored a 93.94% (31 correct out of 33). It's not 100%, but it's still an "A," so I'm satisfied enough to brag about it. Feel free to report your score in the comments. If you do poorly, you can always lie about your score. It's not like anyone can check to find out.

In the meantime, I'm kicking around the idea of adding an exciting new feature to Rob Dow's World. But that will probably have to wait until the next two weeks of hell are over--when I'll officially have a bachelor's degree from a real college, not even one of those crappy online ones. Stay tuned.

Rob

Bigots!

Hello everyone!

I realize I haven't posted in a while, but I'm up to my neck in homework this term. I have 50+pages to write in the next 18 days, plus a bunch of reading, so I doubt I'll post any blogs during for a while unless it's one about how miserable I am. Then I'll have my one last final exam on December 8, and then I'll be finished with being an undergraduate college student--unless I fail, but that goes without saying. After that, I'll have to go shopping for a frame to put my fancy diploma in. Hopefully I'll find a job, otherwise I'll be one of those people at the freeway off-ramp holding a sign that says, "Will blog for a student loan payment!"

So what has happened since my last post? Oh yeah, there was an election two weeks ago. Here's the crazy thing: every person and measure I voted for ended up winning! Of course, that automatically made me reconsider everything I voted for. My votes never win! Was I somehow hoodwinked this time? Were things so bad that mediocrity looked appealing this time around? Time will tell.

Nevertheless, I'm cautiously optimistic. Of course, with Joe Lieberman keeping his post as Senate Homeland Security Committee chair, despite not investigating any of the numerous threats to homeland security during the past two years, such as illegal wiretapping, torture, firing judges for political reasons, etc., etc., etc., and with Hillary Clinton being named as a possible Secretary of State, well...let's just say that this isn't the change I hoped for.

Although, I do have to admit that on election night Cathy and I went to the Lane County Fairgrounds to watch the results come in, and the last time I saw so many watery eyes was at a funeral. During Obama's speech--which was broadcast on a large-screen projection TV--I stood next to a seventy-something-year-old man who was bawling his eyes out like nothing I've ever seen before. That's when I realized the historical significance of what was happening both on the screen and around me. It's one moment I'll never forget. So there!

Of course, not all went well. The bigots won in California. They also won in Florida and Arizona (even though they lost in Arizona in 2006).

But the worst was what happened in Arkansas. The bigots not only won't let same-sex couples marry, but they won't let same-sex couples adopt or take care of foster children. Not only that, opposite-sex couples who are not married can't adopt, and those non-married couples--gay or otherwise--who have adopted or are taking care of foster kids might lose their kids. So these bigots who voted for this pile of crap measure better get themselves down to the local adoption board and adopt some kids pronto, otherwise they'll prove themselves to be a bunch of hypocritical bigots.

And for those of you who think the word "bigot" is too harsh, if you can think of a better word, please let me know. I'm sorry, but I just can't think of any reason to deny gays rights other than bigotry. If you can think of one, please let me know in the comments. I'm not holding my breath.

Well, anyway, I've wasted valuable time blathering on about stuff my readers know fully well about at this point. But don't worry--I'll be back once finals are done, and with more fart jokes than you can shake a can of baked beans at! That's the kind of change you can believe in!

Rob

Vote!

Hello everyone!

I shouldn't have to tell you this, but vote if you haven't already. Don't be stupid.

If you're feeling nostalgic, here's a handy retrospective summary of the presidential election.

Also, if you're planning on turning the TV news election coverage into a drinking game, here are some suggested drink words:

• Project (the long "o" version)
• Campaign
• Precinct
• Race
  
• Ohio
• Pollster
• Grandmother
• Blagojevich
  

Just remember that even though our eight years of hell is (probably) about to end, we've still got a big mess to clean up. So don't stop paying attention.

Rob

Palin Gets Pranked

Hello everyone!

In case you haven't been keeping up, the latest Sarah Palin antic is now making the rounds on "the internets." This time, some wacky morning DJs from Montreal that call themselves the Masked Avengers telephoned Palin and posed as French President Nicholas Sarkozy. Of course, hilarity ensued. Here is the clip, followed by the transcript that I laboriously copied and pasted from CatM at the DailyKos.

SP Assist = Sarah Palin's Assistant
MA = Masked Avengers
SP = Sarah Palin
FNS = Fake Nicolas Sarkozy

Ring

SP Assist: This is Lexi.
MA: Hello, Lexi. This is Frank l’ouvrier (Frank the worker], I’m with President Sarkozy, on the line for Governor Palin.

SP Assist: One second please, can you hold on one second please?
MA: No problem.

SP Assist: Hi, I’m going to hand the phone over to her.
MA: Okay thank you very much I’m going to put the president on the line.
SP Assist: Ok he’s coming to the line.

SP: This is Sarah.
MA: Okay, Governor Palin?

SP: Hellloooo...(long drawn out, like Well, hellooooo)
MA: Just hold on for President Sarkozy, one moment.
SP [To someone in the room]: Oh, it’s not him yet, I always do that. I’ll just have people hand it to me right when it’s them.

FNS: Yes, hello, Governor Palin? Yes, hello, Mrs. Governor?
SP: Hello this is Sarah., how are you?

FNS: Fine, and you, this is Nicolas Sarkozy speaking, how are you?
SP: Oh...so good, it’s so good to hear you. Thank you for calling us.

FNS: Oh, it’s a pleasure.
SP: Thank you sir, we have such great respect for you, John McCain and I, we love you and thank you for spending a few minutes to talk to me.

FNS: I follow your campaigns closely with my special American Advisor Johnny Hallyday, you know?
SP: Yes! Good!

FNS: Excellent! Are you confident?
SP: Very confident and we’re thankful that the polls are showing that the race is tightening and--

FNS: Well I know very well that the campaign can be exhausting. How do you feel right now my dear?
SP: Ah, I feel so good. I feel like we’re in a marathon and at the very end of the marathon, you get your second wind and you plow to the finish—

FNS: You see, I got elected in France because I’m real and you seem to be someone who’s real as well.
SP: Yes, yeah, Nicolas, we so appreciate this opportunity.

FNS: You know, I see you as a president, one day, you too.
SP: [Muahaaa...weird laugh], maybe in 8 years. Haha

FNS: Well, ah, I hope for you. You know we have a lot in common because personally one of my favorite activities is to hunt too.
SP: [Giggle]o h very good, we should go hunting together.

FNS: Exactly! We could go try hunting by helicopter, like you did, I never did that.
SP: [Giggle]

FNS: Like we say in France, "on pourrait tuer des bébés phoques aussi" [Translation: We could also kill some baby seals.]
SP: [Giggle] Well I think we could have a lot of fun together as we’re getting work done, we can kill two birds with one stone that way.

FNS: I just love killing those animals. Mm, mm. Take away a life, that is so fun!
SP: [Hahahaha]

FNS: I’d really love to go as long as we don’t bring your Vice president Cheney, hahaha.
SP: No, I’ll be a careful shot, yes.

FNS: You know we have a lot in common also except that from my house I can see Belgium. That’s kind of less interesting than you.
SP: Well, see, we’re right next door to other countries that we all need to be working with, yes.

FNS: Some people said in the last days, and I thought that was mean, that you weren’t experienced enough in foreign relations, and you know, that’s completely false, that’s the thing I said to my great friend, the Prime Minister of Canada, Stef Carse [Stephen Harper is the PM].
SP: Well, he’s doing fine, too, and yeah when you come into a position underestimated, it gives you the opportunity to prove the pundits and the critics wrong. You work that much harder-

FNS: I, I was wondering because you are also next to him, one of my good friends, also, the prime minister of Quebec, Mr. Richard Z. Sirois [a famous Quebec radio host], have you met him recently? Did he come to one of your rallies?
SP: Uh, haven’t seen him at one of the rallies, but it’s been great working with the Canadian officials in my role as governor; we have a great cooperative effort there as we work on all of our resource development projects. You know I look forward to working with you and getting to meet you personally and your beautiful wife, oh my goodness, you’ve added a lot of energy to your country, even, with that beautiful family of yours.

FNS: Thank you very much. You know my wife, Carla, would love to meet you. You know even though she was a bit jealous that I was supposed to speak to you today. [Hahahaha]
SP: [Hahahha] Well give her a big hug from me.

FNS: You know my wife is a popular singer and a former top model and she’s so hot in bed. She even wrote a song for you.
SP: Oh my goodness! I didn’t know that.

FNS: Yes, in French, it’s called Du rouge à lèvres sur une cochonne [Translate: Lipstick on a smutty girl (note: I've seen other sites that say this translates to lipstick on a sow)] or if you prefer in English Joe the Plumber, [sings] It’s his life, Joe the Plumber..."
SP: Maybe she understands some of the unfair criticism but I bet you she is such a hard worker, too, and she realizes you just plow through that criticism like

FNS: I just want to be sure, I don’t’ quite understand the phenomenon "Joe the Plumber," that’s not your husband, right?
SP: Mmhmm, that’s into my husband but he’s a normal American who just works hard and doesn’t want government to take his money.

FNS: Yes, yes, I understand, we have the equivalent of Joe the Plumber in France, it’s called, "Marcel, the guy with bread under his armpit, oui."
SP: Right. That’s what it’s all about, is the middle class, and government needing to work for them. You’re a very good example for us here.

FNS: I seen a bit about NBC even Fox News wasn’t an ally, an ally, sorry, about as much as usual.
SP: Yeah that’s what we’re up against.

FNS: I must say, Governor Palin, I love the documentary they made on your life, you know, Hustler’s "Nailin Palin."
SP: Oh, good, thank you. Yes.

FNS: That was really edgy.
SP: [Laughs] Well good.

FNS: I really love you. And I must say something, so, Governor, you’ve been pranked.
By the Master Avengers. We’re two comedians from Montreal
SP: Oohhh have we been pranked? And what radio station is this? [tries to force herself to sound nice but you can tell she’s pissed]

FNS: This is for CKOI in Montreal.
SP: In Montreal? Tell me the radio station call letters
[SP leaves phone, continuous griping in background, sounds like, "For chrissakes...that was ??? Just a radio station prank...chrissakes..."]

MA: Hello? If one voice can change the world for Obama, one Viagra can change the world for McCain.
[Man’s voice in background: hang up, hang up.]
SP Assist: Hi, I’m sorry, I have to let you go. Um, thank you.

Rob