Oh, To Be "On Notice" and Not Dead!
Hello Everyone!
During the nineties, they used to say that a band had truly "made it" if the band's video was featured on Beavis and Butt-head. I don't have a band, let alone a video, and there are no more new Beavis and Butt-head episodes, so I figured I'd never "make it". But then this happened:
I'm not sure exactly why, but apparently I was put "On Notice" by Stephen Colbert himself! I even ranked higher than Barbra Streisand, so I'm very happy! If I were to croak right here at this keyboard, I'd know I had lived a fulfilling life.
But if I were to drop dead and you were to attend my funeral, you better remember to turn off your cell phone lest bad things might happen to you:
Karma's a bitch!
Thanks again to everyone who keeps sending me stuff. You guys make maintaining a blog for no pay in my spare time fun and easy.
Rob
During the nineties, they used to say that a band had truly "made it" if the band's video was featured on Beavis and Butt-head. I don't have a band, let alone a video, and there are no more new Beavis and Butt-head episodes, so I figured I'd never "make it". But then this happened:
I'm not sure exactly why, but apparently I was put "On Notice" by Stephen Colbert himself! I even ranked higher than Barbra Streisand, so I'm very happy! If I were to croak right here at this keyboard, I'd know I had lived a fulfilling life.But if I were to drop dead and you were to attend my funeral, you better remember to turn off your cell phone lest bad things might happen to you:
Thanks again to everyone who keeps sending me stuff. You guys make maintaining a blog for no pay in my spare time fun and easy.
Rob
posted by Rob at 11:21 PM
11 Comments:
He probably put you on notice because you let his cousin post on here.
That makes no sense. Don't you think he'd be happy to see his cousin here spreading the message just like he spreads the message of "Papa Bear"?
Sheesh!
Rob
Obviously he isn't. In fact, since his cuz was on here, you probably had more leeway then the rest of us. What did you do to him? You touched him in an inappropriate place didn't you? Like in the back of a Volvo, maybe?
Greg, leave the jokes to professionals like me.
Rob
That was a professional joke. Kevin Smith got paid for that joke.
Besides, it is up to maverick renegades like me to keep the professionals on their toes. You've just sold out, man. "Ooo look at me, I have a blog" (read that in a high-pitched voice please)
You are now part of the machine and I, sir, shall Rage Against it. Now if you will excuse me, I am going to make a vodka & cran.
Kevin Smith may have gotten paid, but it was because he's Kevin Smith, not because the joke was funny. He has his off days, I suppose. Every day for you is an off day.
And for the record, I haven't sold out yet, but I'm trying.
"Ooo look at me, I'm going to have a vodka & cran. " (read that in a high-pitched voice please).
A "vodka & cran"??? When did you have a sex change?
Rob
I'm ALL man, buddy. Are you suggesting vodka is a feminine drink? Its Russia's national drink. Their life expectancy is only 65 years. If that isn't manly, I don't know what is.
Plus, it helps cut down on the beer gut. And its cheaper.
No, vodka on its own is pretty androgynous. Mixing it with cranberry juice, or any fruit juice for that matter, except maybe orange is what makes it girly. You might as well be drinking a wine cooler or a Zima for crying out loud.
If you were to actually go out and get a job instead of sitting around on your butt all day surfing the Internet, then maybe you wouldn't have to worry about your "beer gut", nor would you have to worry about cost.
Stephen Colbert needs to put *you* on notice!
Get a job! Pay taxes! Financially support illegal invasions! See, you ARE part of the machine.
Uh-oh, sounds like somebody needs another "vodka & cran". Would you like a Midol with that?
See? Now you want to control my mind with your drugs. I see through your disguise, ha ha, charade you are.
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