Monday, December 15, 2008

Daily Win and Fail: Episode 1

Hello everyone!

Well, I passed all my classes. That means that pending UO final approval, I now have a Bachelor of Arts degree in Political Science with a History minor!

It also means that now I have to get a job. But with my degree choice coupled with the craptastic current economy, it might be a while. I still have my part-time tutor gig at LCC to tide me over plus a fantastic Sugar Mama, so I probably won't be sleeping in a car anytime soon (unless the students loans decide to imitate their sub-prime mortgage cousins and tank, in which case both Cathy and I will be sleeping in our car). Still, we'd like to buy a house at some point, and not having to scrape by is always nice, so a decent job I will find. If I could make a career out of blogging, I would, but ask yourselves this, would you pay to read this crap? I wouldn't!

Of course, now that I'm no longer writing papers for school, I have much more free time to add more crap to this pile. I may not be able to give you quality, but I can give you quantity! See, we're already three paragraphs in, and all I've said is that I've graduated, I need to find a job, and my blog sucks! Yet, look at how many words I used!

As I hinted in a posting from a couple weeks ago, I'm adding a new feature to Rob Dow's World. It's not exactly in a finalized form or anything, so let's call it the "beta version." First, some background:

I've been inspired by my Writing 123 instructor from my Spring 2005 term at LCC. He blogs under the name "Raymond Pert." In addition to the noteworthy events happening in his life and the fantastic observations about life, he also posts a semi-regular feature, "Three Beautiful Things." This is where he basically relates three good experiences he had that day, and it spreads joy and all that crap. I do remember once reading that he said he tries to post a Three Beautiful Things every day, and that blogging was a way for him practice writing and be in contact with old friends and family. So by trying to post every day, he's forcing himself to write regularly--although, now that I look at his blog, he hasn't posted very regularly recently. For the sake of this posting, let's just pretend he has.

Anyway, since I enjoy writing and since I often forget that I enjoy writing until I start writing, I thought having my own daily feature would force me to post on a regular basis, as well as ideally improving this blog somewhat. But posting Three Beautiful Things is not really my style. I can manage one beautiful thing, but only if I have one other thing that I can bitch about to balance things out. So with that in mind, I give you:

Rob Dow's World presents:

Daily Win and Fail

Someday, perhaps for Christmas Saturnalia, someone who knows what he or she is doing might create a fancy logo for this header. As it stands now, what you see is what you get.

You're probably wondering what this feature is all about. Well, I haven't settled on one idea just yet. But for now, it will (probably) consist of (at least) two sections: Win and Fail. The criteria for determining these two are pretty simple: "Win" kicks ass and "Fail," well, if you don't understand what "fail" signifies, just go to the FAIL Blog.

Anyway, onto our first winners!

Win: The shoe thrower!

Now, I'm not advocating throwing objects at the president or anyone else, but if you have to throw an article of clothing, shoes are the way to go! A shirt just won't make it to your target, particularly if it's one of those lightweight cotton button-down shirts. Pants have the same problem, and even if you throw your jeans, you're still left standing there (or getting tackled by security) in your undies. Speaking of undies, they would make great projectiles, particularly if they're soiled, and socks would as well, but it's almost impossible to take off one's underwear or socks without first having to remove other garments. Although, years ago I went to this party and some girl was able to take off her bra and panties without taking off her shirt or pants....

Anyway, unless you're the girl at the party, shoes are your best bet. Now, I realize that many journalists have been claiming that throwing one's shoes has a symbolic meaning in the Arab world, but I take that with a grain of salt since these idiots haven't gotten anything right about the Arab world in my lifetime, except the one time one of them admitted there's lots of oil there.

Of course, there are doubters:

But over the years I've learned that anything Mike Myers has done since So I Married an Axe Murderer isn't worth paying attention to.

Anyway, the new shoe bomber has become a hero of sorts in the Middle East. Of course, Bush thinks (or at least claims with a straight face) that a journalist throwing his shoes at the president is a sign that freedom is on the march. I agree. I remember that press conference in 1979 during the Iran hostage crisis when Helen Thomas threw her red patent leather pump at President Carter.

Regardless, the shoe throwing incident has proven itself to be a win!

fail owned pwned pictures

Fail: It snowed here:

Normally, I would be glad to see snow as it gives us a nice break from the six month long dreary, rainy Oregon winter. However, most people here in Eugene don't know how to drive in snow, and for some reason, many of them think that driving in snow is just like driving on dry pavement except you should go a lot faster and ride the bumper of the person in front of you (usually either Cathy or me). As a result, going out in a snowstorm becomes a game of Russian Roulette. Fail!

fail owned pwned pictures

Well, I hope you've enjoyed the pilot episode of Daily Win and Fail. Come back tomorrow for another episode! Good night!



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