The Guy Who Thinks Everyone Is Deaf

Hello everyone!

I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with Billy Mays. No, I'm not talking about Willie Mays. No, not Willie Mays Hayes, nor Robert Hays. I'm talking about this ignoramus:

Anyone who watches television on a semi-regular basis has seen, or rather "heard" this blockhead screaming at the viewers to buy the latest plastic piece of crap. And if you call now, he'll throw in two additional plastic pieces of crap for only $19.95! CALL NOW!

Each time I hear him yelling and carrying on, I have an uncontrollable urge to throw a brick through my television. The only thing that's saved my TV is the fact that I don't have any bricks handy, so the worst thing that happens is that a throw pillow gets, well, thrown at the guy's stupid, yelling face.

Yet, I'm oddly fascinated by him. And it turns out I'm not the only one. Apparently, he's developed a legion of followers, and for your viewing pleasure I've compiled comments from his fans that I've found right here on the Internets...

His talent of being able to shout at a conversational level is nerve grating. -Cal

When one of Billy Mays's commercials comes on the screen I either mute the tv or change channels. I'll be glad when he has run his course! -James L Thomas

Billy Mays is the most obnoxious whining, screaming asshole on TV and he’s getting rich doing it. Shows how idiotic the citizens of this country are. -Harvey

Billy Mayes must be corrupt as the companies he advertises for. -Robert

The guy drives me BATTY! I’ve been known to dive across another person to reach the mute button! -Mike P.

What an irritating SOB! -RJ

I have an allergic reaction everytime I hear this abrasive, loud, obnoxious voice. -Helen Barak

Billy Mays is nothing more than a modern day snake oil salesman. -Paul

I initially wondered if he was hearing-impaired as that sometimes accounts for speaking so loud but apparently he is just a loud, abrasive guy. -Daura

I hope someone gets irritated enough to start some sort of “ban Billy Mays” movement. I will join in a heartbeat if it has the possibility of removing this irritant from my living room. -Roger

After much thought, over many years, I still cannot, for the life of me, understand just where Billy Mays' credibility is supposed to come from. -Dave

Why a greasy-looking loudmouth with a belligerent tone should appeal to anyone who’s looking for cleaning products mystifies me. -Smithy

I’m so sick of his screaming and mangy looking beard. -ann

I mute him as soon as I hear his voice. My concern is that I may miss a product that automatically mutes him at the first sound of his voice. That’s what I want for Christmas. -Marty R

Billy, GET LOST and take the Geico Caveman with you -Roger Williams

You sir are a sales prostitute. -Bob Marbs

The only thing worse than listening to Billy Mays is having to listen to George ‘W’. -Chuck

How many tubes of [Mighty Putty] would you need to putty Billy Mays mouth shut? That's all I want to know. -otto

Billy Mays is a knob. -eschoendorff

Not only is he widely adored, but he has also rescued Christian peace activists in Iraq. True story.



Billy Mays. A true American hero.

Rob